Perhaps the hardest thing I have to deal with in my life is the expectation that we are at the zenith of our earthly lives. It won't get any better than this, and will likely get very, very much worse before it gets blissfully better. However, I don't understand the blissfully better very well, and have a very graphic vision of the worse.
What's worse, I have children that I must prepare for their lives in this. I can't honestly paint beautiful pictures for them about their future, nor do I dare paint the horror that could also be. All I can do is assure them of the goodness of the God we serve, and the awesome future we will share at the return of Christ. And teach them what they need to walk in faith, no matter what.
Here is a snip of something my daughter wrote for a school assignment:
What if the sun exploded? Well lets say that it did explode. So one day you were walking along. Then a few people come running up the street yelling that the time has come. You are puzzled for a minute but the you realize it was what you had all been waiting for for years. The death of the sun.
Now, I don't think Revelation says the sun will explode and I don't think that particular fear is hanging about her head. However, this sense of impending doom is a part of her life, and I hate, HATE, HATE that above all. I hate it when people in my husband's confidence talk about prophecy in front of her, I hate it when they leave printouts about the anti-Christ around the house, and I hate the gun she got for her birthday. I'd like to spit "doom" out permanently and raise my children with an honest optimism instead of this evasive "Don't ask about that" stance.
And yet there can be no resurrection without death. There can be no birth without labor. There can be no restoration without destruction. I would just like my epidural now, thank you very much.
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4 comments:
An idea if you have time. Read a book called Heaven by Randy Alcorn. Just may be a different perspective on all of this.
Heaven lives on my nightstand, actually. I have found it encouraging, so good call. It is just going to take time and meditation to wrap my heart around it all. And revelation, too.
Ooh wow I'm so glad I found your blog! Thanks for reading mine. I so often feel like it's the end of the world, looking at the covers of People magazine, assaulting me at the check-out line. My sister home schools her kids, too, and they are turning out like the only hope for the future. Rock on, girl. And yes, my husband and I have flunked out of church as well. But when I read of all the people who have done so, like you; when I read their blogs and hear their hearts and check our hearts compared to what Jesus did, I'm thinking maybe we're not crazy. Maybe something really is happening, and flunking out is the best thing for our spiritual health, to find "Church" with people who are like minded, who love Jesus and who aren't weird. Even if our parents think we are. Keep writing!
Wow, thank you for the encouragement. It means so much to not be alone, you know? Your blog is beautiful and engagingly written.
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